Update!!!!

We found frankie! he is currently in the hospital. he is ok, He wanted to go, he is on medication now and is doing better. I will be going to see him tomorrow. My friend puts it like this, he isnt gonna get better unless he wants to, kind of like smoking you won't quit till you want to... So he wants the help and he is already seeming a little better. Thank you again to everyone.

now I hope you all have a happy and safe halloween...

PS my cake came out super yummy but its a complete mess... the cake itself was too crumly and fell apart all over the place... so no pics, sorry...

Thank you

Thank you everyone for being so thoughtful at a time that is so hard. I know that Frankie is somewhere and eventually we will find him with hopes that he is well. Yet it makes me reflect on what I have and how grateful I am. I know that sometimes I get very frustrated with hubby but I am happy to say that I have a loving and supportive hubby that is a productive part of our family. No matter how many times I might complain about his inability to help out, he is of sane mind to help me when and if I ask for it. He is there enough to stand by my side through thick and thin.. Not to mention that no matter how many problems I have with his mother I have to remember that she is not a psycho nut job and is a good loving person. Frankie's Girlfriend is a wonderful woman. She is loving and a great mommy. And life isn't easy when you don't have the other person in your relationship helping you to move forward in life.

So this whole situation has been a complete downer for me. Its making me completely freak out. Now its not that I'm stress eating or anything, but I just feel like crap about this. I am trying to keep myself up and happy, but its really hard. Now for me that's crazy, I can't be happy right now. Its like a once in a lifetime thing. I guess the fact that we can't do anything makes it worse too. I am going to try and smile and send my buddy good vibes to come home.

So on with life I go.
Now I said I wasn't gonna bake this weekend but the fact that I had a 45% off coupon for Micheal's got the best of me! I bought the starter kit! I also bought coloring for the icing and all the supplies I am going to make a yummy chocolate cake from scratch with Orange Frosting. Now I don't think I have enough to decorate the top of the cake but I know I have enough to ice the cake. So for my first experiment it will be nice and simple! I know I'm a dork but who cares! I hope I get the time with the munchkin to get it all done today. I hope she sleeps and lets me play in the kitchen!

Now as for the past few days I have been slacking with posts and what not, but since wednesday I have been hidding something. I had 9 pieces of candy- 5 milky ways, 2 twix, a kitkat, and a lil pack of sour patch kids. I was sooo sick! I haven't had that much candy for over 6 months! And the weirdest thing is two Halloweens ago I think I would have eaten 3 times that much without a problem. Last Halloween I don't even remember it was such a blur! All I know was the princess was a monkey with a banana!poor thing she wasn't even a month old and look at me torturing her! and holy cow, All I know is I couldn't stop laughing when I did this! it was just wayyyyy wayyyy tooo funny! oh not to mention underneath that she is wearing a white shirt that says "I love my Mummy!" with white pants... get it she was a mummy too! ahahahaha... ok that sure brought a big ass smile to my face! Uh I really needed that! PS: she is wearing Halloween socks in the picture, they have lil spiderwebs on them! (I love target dollar section! I got the shirt and 3 Halloween socks for 4 bucks!)

I am very excited for tomorrow. Its almost the baby's first Halloween. We are going trick or treating and I am super excited for it! Candy for me(and hubby), and the baby gets to go out and have FUN! I'm not wearing a costume, I know lame right? Well I haven't worn one since middle school. I was always a black cat though. Actually I am wearing all black right now. I have no idea what to wear tomorrow. I just want to look cute for Halloween, not a costume. Any ideas? Ok well I am going to get some work done. AKA take care of my other 2 blogs... Talk to you later!


HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

update on Frankie

We have not found him yet. we checked his mother's house, not there. Hopitals were checked, no word yet. My friend works for the government, he will be checking frankie's phone records and see if he signed up for the airfoce which is something frankie mentioned a few months ago. We have no idea where he might be. It might be that his mom has him hidding in the basement or some crazy shit like that. As for the police, Frankie has some run in's with the cops in his youth so the cops are the last people we want to talk to. We pretty much have to wait till Monday to check the phone records. We will go from there and I will update you if anything happens.
As for where he may be, he could be anywhere. He says he has money, from where we have no idea. But he has a car and with gas he can go anywhere. So if anyone knows or sees anything let me know please. Thank you

Bad news pending

ok, Bad news pending. my friend has up and disappeared. Now he is well capable of taking care of himself that's not the problem. We are just really worried about him. He isn't in the right state of mind and I am going to roam around the streets of our home town to go look for him. This is very disheartening for me. I grew up with him, He is one of my brother's best friends so he is like a big brother. He has a 3 year old boy that needs a father. Please pray for him. I know that its crazy but here is his pic if you see he Please let me know if you see him




His name is Frankie, he really is a great guy. If you see him there will be nothing wrong with him and he is completely harmless, just way mentally lost at this point. I would really appreciate if anyone sees him, We are on long Island but it could be NJ, Staten Island, NYC and its 5 boroughs, CT, PA, or any other close by location.

I have made up my mind!

Now you all know I have been after the infamous Wii Fit for MONTHS! Well I have to say that after the past two days I have decided that my obsession with the Wii Fit is done! Why? Well for the past two days I have been working out with Exercisetv.tv .. Yup you heard me right! I have been working out for 2 days, I have enjoyed it very much. And besides the fact the I am not super soar and dying over here I can continue working out without a laps! So the reason I wanted Wii Fit was to have an instructional how to of what to do kind of workout. (if that just made any sense?) So now that I have FREE workout videos that are easy to pick and choose different types of workouts, I am happy to say that I am saving my 100bucks and spending it on baking goods!

what irony! So I have discussed and debated over taking baking classes at Micheal's. Well This weekend I found out that classes are 27bucks plus supplies... uhh can we say 50+ a pop! No thank you, so I am going to get some supplies with my 45% off coupon and just go online and use some tutorial videos! Ah the great vastness of the internet! I love it! First off I am trying not to bake till Halloween is over, but I fear that this is inevitable! I am itching to do something! So since I am not making dinner tonight (hubby coming home late) I will be baking AFTER I work out. Now originally I had planned since I am going to be out all day I will not work out, BUT I will get a half hour or more workout in! I have from 230-730 to go out and do everything I got to do! The only responsibility I have today is to call in dinner from the Chinese food place.... EASY!

So I plan on making Chocolate cake from scratch and butter cream frosting from scratch. Now I think I will make the frosting today and make the cake tomorrow. This way I can get a grip on what I'm venturing into and not go over board. Also the two recipes that I have are super easy.

Chocolate cake:

Ingredients:

• 2 cups (12 oz.) semi-sweet chocolate chips divided
• 3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) butter or margarine
• 1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
• 3 eggs
• 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
• 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 1/2 cups water

Now seeing how I have everything except chocolate chips and eggs, it seems easy enough right?

as for the butter cream frosting goes:


which means all I need is powdered sugar. I can't wait to get started! Home made cake from scratch not a box!

Hot Dog!

heehee, Hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog! So lets see how many of you know where thats from?

anyway, on the front of moving out. I found a really nice apt here in town for 1,000... Sux that its soo much, and I don't know if its still available but... its always worth a shot to find out! I want to see if they could price it at 900 to include everything... It's such a long shot but worth it! The way it looks like rent is going around here no one is grabing so maybe a lower price with the intent for an income will work?

But that on the back burner, I'm not moving just yet. (although my heart races at the idea, or maybe thats just my workout that I just did, Yes you heard me right I just worked out YAHOO! for 45 min too! but not the point) Me and hubby last night put a budget together to save $5000 by June to move out! Yup you heard me right, stinker pooh daddy pants... Ah shucks! I love him! He is really on board with all of this! I am soo happy. We want to enjoy our Xmas to the fullest than its major savings time!

I can't belive how happy I am right now! Seriously honestly, I wanted to move out by the end of the year/or get my finances straight that we could start looking come the first of the month. Well we could start looking and comit any time after January(which means I met my goal). But we want to save a lil more pay down our credit card debt and have money for stuff like a couch, tv stand, plates, and a kitchen table (we have everything else). I went even as far as to track down all MY stuff that is in the kitchen, so when moving comes its nice and easy and I have a mental itinerary of all my things and where they are. I have pots and pans, cooking utensiles silverwear, and the works but when I moved in I got rid of my plates and glasses. So I have everything except plates and glasses. I got like 3 pie plates though... anyone need one? hehe! I am in such a good mood! oh and to top off the savings, we are at a point where we have a constant amount of cash in our bank account! Now thats all fine and dandy. I'm still making an effort to get food stamps cause without them the whole moving out thing won't work!

So that is my excitment so much so that I had a full 45 min full body workout today, streignth training/cardio/pilates workout! Oh I already am feeling it! I am going to be super soar!

Weight loss at its finest

I have been "on break" but it is back to work over here!

I will be keeping track of weekly things and will log them as such once a week: Since this week incorporates more than one week its a doozie!
Here goes!

Vitamins:
T[X] W[x] R[] F[x] S[] S[] M[x]
Workouts:
T[110 CAL] W[145 CAL] R[] F[] S[bowling?] S[] M[]
10/20: It felt good to work out again!
10/21: workn out with baby in toe is not that easy!
Walks:
T[] W[] R[] F[X] S[X] S[X] M[X]
fri/sat/sun/mon, cause I was on my feet walking around with munchkin all day!
Under 1300 cal:
T[1725] W[?] R[?] F[?] S[2-bday party] S[ate out :( ] M[? 1400 ?]
Water 10glasses or more:
T[9] W[10] R[9] F[8] S[7] S[6] M[10]

PS: R= Thursday (wow that makes me feel really antiquated. I don't know anyone who uses that. R actually stands for review, which way back when in school Friday was test day Thursday was review day. I think that comes out of the mid 1900s but I'm not even that old... I've been using it ever since middle school...OUCH)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So today's weigh in is at 144!
Now I know this is no loss, yet, for me this is success! I have not "dieted" aka restricted my cal for the past few days at all! I feel bloated like a cow from eating out on Sunday. I feel good about where I am! I wish I could have done more sit ups, but my lil tummy is in pain. Sooo sit ups are going to wait till my tummy feels better. I have 9 more lbs to lose to get to my goal. Its kind of scary to even think about it. I have never been able to maintain my weight in the 145 range. I used to be able to maintain at 150-155, but this is 10lbs less! Kind of cool to think about. I am on a path to lose the last 9lbs. I know that I have it in me to keep pushing. Everyone tells me I look great. Its a nice feeling to have people acknowledge my hard work but, its going to be even better when I lose the last bit of weight.

Now this coming week:
I want to make every effort to work out every day! Not only that, no candy! (except for Sat.) We bought Halloween candy on Sunday and I have been picking at it. I have had all of 7 pieces in 2 days. I know that's not a lot but I shouldn't be having any of it! In the effort to lose weight, I will be using the EA active every day this week. As for sit-ups, I will be starting as soon as my tummy feels better. I am hoping that that will be tonight. Sunshine Momma, gave me some great pointers on sit-ups and how they help. Making the effort to do the sit-ups and work out I think will dramatically help me, if not to lose weight to lose inches.

Now, for water consumption. I bought myself a water bottle to take to work with me. So while I'm at work I get about 24oz from the water bottle and another 12 from my tea. I also have 12 oz before I leave in the morning. And as long as I have a glass when I get home, 1 before I start cooking dinner, 1 before I eat, 1 after dinner and 1 before bed I have a total of 13.5 8oz glasses of water/OR 108 oz of water a day! This is soo crucial to keeping my Cal count down.

As for my body. I have to be super careful. I need to stretch out more often. I need to keep limber and not give up on the caring part of my body. Working out is great but for me its a stress on my body that hurts. I need to make sure to stretch and stay focused that I do not hurt myself more than I already am. Starting this week, I am going to be incorporating meditation. I have not figured out how and when but I will find the time. The inner strength I need to keep going is the only way I will be able to focus on losing the weight and without losing sight of what is really important, my health.

Well off to accomplish my tasks of the day! I hope everyone have a wonderful and progressive weigh in day!

"Let me help you eat that"

So as you may all know, I'm on a tight budget when it comes to money. Especially in the food department. So much so that I have applied for food stamps. So anyway, I budget out how much food me and hubby will eat, and what I will make for the munchkin. I can keep our grocery bill down to under $100 a week. That being said last week, I was able to spend only $30. Which was just fresh foods and bread. They had a great sale on the bread that I eat for breakfast. Peperage Farm Cinnamon Raisin Bread. I'm not a bread person but I need my filling of carbs in the morning to keep me till 2:30 when I get home from work. Mainly my breakfast consists of a slice of toast and a half cup of yogurt.

So I found the bread on sale for 2/3! WOW, usually a loaf is $3.99. So I grabbed 2 loafs and called it a day. I figured it would last me 3 weeks. that's $8.00 that I don't have to spend! Yet I bought the two loafs of bread on Wednesday. Now at 1 or even 2 slices a day there should be 1 whole loaf and a half left over right? well, I go into the kitchen this morning and smell Cinnamon raisin. I say yummy! Little did my nose care that my eyes saw that there was a whole loaf eatten already! Now back track...

My mother -in - law is eatting my bread. mind you we are on a tight budget me and hubby. And by all hell my mother - in -law doesn't help with anything if anything she hurts! So a few weeks ago, I was eating breakfast and my mother-in-law comes in. She sees me eating my yogurt and 1 slice of toast. She goes to me "let me help you eat that", Takes my loaf of bread and takes 4 slices. Rambling on how I don't eat enough, mostly about me on a diet but that she is fat and she doesn't care and is still going to eat her 4 slices of MY BREAD.

Now for the past few days, I think my mother-in-law has gotten to my bread. Normally if you were anyone considerate I would love to share with you. But, when you take advantage and abuse a good thing I get mad. I had toast maybe 2 times in the past 4 days. Maybe I had 3 slices. so how does that whole loaf of bread disappear? My lovely ungrateful, inconsiderate, overweight, unhealthy, glutton of a mother - in-law. She has been eating 4 slices every morning for the past few days. Why? Cause she is too lazy to go food shopping. I spend more money on their food than I do on ours! It happens all the time! Everything I buy they use! I understand that if there is bread sure have some, but don't eat the whole fuckn thing on me! Have a lil respect and consideration!

Now this doesn't just apply to the bread, this is anything I put in the fridge. Now, I think everyone knows that I don't drink soda, or anything else besides water. Well a few months ago I had bought myself a special treat. Its Italian lemon soda. Its not sweet like normal soda, its 150 cal per can, so seeing how I'm on a diet its a very rare and special treat for me. That and I have to be in the mood to have a stomach ache afterward. Now since its imported its expensive. I got a six pace and called it a day. I have one can left. Mind you I only had 3 previously. So where did the other 2 go? Into my mother-in-law. Who knew that it was a special treat for myself. I bought it as my b-day present! Did she care? No!

Now, me and my hubby are 2 people. I buy things like potatos, butter, milk, eggs, drinks, garlic, onions, tomatos, canned tomatos, bread (not just my bread), ketchup, dish detergent, laundry detergent, Clorox whips, and the list goes on. Now its me hubby and my one year old daughter. We live with my Mother-in-law, father-in-law, brother-in-law and sister-in-law. Why am I paying for those 4 extra people. Not to mention that my father-in-law, brother-in-law and sister-in-law are BEYOND WASTEFUL! They have a plate of food and wind up throwing more than half of it in the trash! EVERY DAY! The only reason I don't put my mother in law in that category is her mouth is a garbage! She will have 10 servings of anything put in her face! So She doesn't waist food, but everyone else does. I pay my hard earned money for the rest of them to throw it in the trash!

Me and hubby buy special detergent, for my daughter's cloths... I have to hide it! Yea I know pathetic! When is this ever going to stop! Yes we live there for free, but believe me I already pay my dues and its not in the stuff that they use of ours. I am their personal driver! I'm my sister-in-laws babysitter (she is 15!), I am the only one who cleans in that house! uhhh, I'm sick of this shit! I want to move!!!!!! NOW

sorry bout the rant... I'm beyond frustrated!

Its late so this shall be short

I just wanted to keep everyone in the loop. I did great for 2 days working out and what not but I do have to say that I was soar for a few days and than stress of a "loving and happy marrage" stepped in. You know those days when you want to kill you lovely hubby cause they are just that horrible of a person!
Well that started on thursday. I had such high hopes for my day. I was so excited about what I wanted to do and get done... well nothing happened the way it was supposed to. I do have to say though that things are better. Not 100% there is a lot of work that has to be done. I am not someone that looks for change in others. I accept them the way they are but seriously, hubby has to step up his game! AND SOON.

I can't keep on living like this. for the most part I want to move out and we have no savings, I also am someone who hates to repeat themselves. So I am a believer in do it cause its got to get done. Serioulsy why do I have to keep after him like a child? I shouldn't have to at all! but anyway. I just hope he makes progress and doesn't digress again. I can't stand when he does that. I told him on thursday:
"I am anoying the hell out of myself when I have to repeat myself, You know I don't want to listen to myself bitch again."

Now if those arn't the words of a pissed off woman than I dont know what is...

Well anyway after a full out blowout last night (saturday), and a rough night seeing how I can't sleep when im upset, today went well. We had a good day. I hope that things will get better. All I got to say is that I am making progress in my life and if he can't keep up with me he will be left in the dust.

ok well nighty night people!

quizzle for shillze....

Sorry bout the title I just had to!

1. Who was your first prom date? never went to prom, But I did pick up my bro from prom night who was the chef that cooked for where my prom was held.

2. Do you still talk to your first love? Well, The kid I was in love with forever, I would consider not my first love. my first boyfriend I would consider my first love, and my only regret. yes I still talk to him. I even saw him over the summer.

3. What was your first alcoholic drink? hmmm, been drinking wine since I remember, and other desert liqueurs too.. So I would say first time was wine at about 4-5 years

4. What was your first job? Bakery I was 15, I miss those days. I made 85 bucks a week! I felt rich!

5. What was your first car? Poniac grand am, blue. This car is the love of my life! (No I do not have it any longer my ex destroyed it!)

6. Who was the first person to text you today? mia

7. Who was the first person you thought of this morning? my daughter rash butt... So I guess my daughter..

8. Who was your first grade teacher? oh damn, I forgot her name but I did like her alot.

9. Where did you go on your first flight in a plane? I was a year old I went to italy

10. Who was your first best friend and do you still talk? My bff I met in kindergarten, and she is my daughter's godmother... we get together about once a month... Love her to death but we never get to see each other enough we have different lives and different schedules

11. Where was your first sleepover? my bff's house, unless you count my aunt's house

12. Who was the first person you talked to today? my daughter. If it doesnt count cause she cant talk back than hubby

13. Whose wedding were you in for the first time? my cuz, I was a junior brides maid

14. What was the first thing you did this morning? feed my daughter

15. What was the first concert you went to? hatebreed, that was the first concert apart from like orchestra concerts with my parents.

16. First tattoo? nope

17. First piercing? earings before I left the hospital when I was born

18. First foreign country you went to? italy, when I was one (im not sure if it was earlier, might have been. my bro went when he was 6 months and I know I was a lil older than him the first time I went... )

19. First movie you remember seeing? I have no idea....

20. What state (province) did you first live in? NY, always and maybe forever

21. Who was your first room mate? Chrissy, Uhhh I really did not like her...

22. When was your first detention? I dont know, I know Ive gotten detention but I dont think I ever served detention.... Yea I was good like that...

23. When was your first kiss? freshman year with my first bf, the one above...

24. What is one thing you would learn, given the chance? Oh there is just way too many things to answer that question...

25. Who will be the next person to post this? ? maybe someone that wants me to know them better.

New England Clam Chowder!

Yummy Yummy Yummy Yummy Yummy!!!!!

All I have to say is new England clam chowder is really easy to make! Sorry no pics but I do have to say it looked, smelled and tasted and yummy! I found the recipe online on youtube! Its actually an Alton Brown special that they added to youtube. So there is this thing called Pork Bacon. I never heard about it before. Holy cow its glorified bacon, there is soo much salt on it too. uh anyway the recipe calls just for the pork bacon fat. that onions, potatoes milk, clams and clam juice. I always though it was this way complicated dish. If you watch the video , you'll see just how easy it is. now most shows the elapse time so that cooking for like 3 hours only takes a half. well just to let you know it only took an hour from beginning to end! I do have to say that I did have two servings though.

Anyway besides yummy chowder (yes I like saying chowder), I have worked out for the past 2 days. I am very proud of myself. I do have to say that working out with the munchkin is not that easy. She keeps on pulling on my resistance band and tries to take my Wii remote away from me. Oh and the best had to be my daughter laughing at me. Yes she was laughing at me working out... Great confidence booster! yea right.. well I'm happy I make someone laugh... :(

More importantly this morning I weighed in at 143, I am not sure how accurate that actually is but I hope it is progress! I do have to say that I have been doing very poorly on keeping my cal down, than again my water intake has been quite low. I have been averaging 10 glasses a day. I need to go buy myself a water bottle to take to work with me. I am thinking one that holds 20 oz. This way I have 12 in the am 12 as tea, 20 oz at work, and 12 more oz as soon as I get home. now that's 56 oz by 3 pm! I think that's pretty good!

I will be focusing on my water these next few days to see if it helps. I am hoping with the increase of water I can decrease my cal at lest by 100 or so. I have to see how I did with the Chowder, to see if I went over at all. I am aiming for 1200 a day and before dinner I was at 600 for the day. Which means if 2 servings was 600 or less I'm in! Oh speaking of counting cal. I am wearing my pants, that back in august Just fit, now I do have to say that I am down almost 10lbs! Holy cow! But I put my pants on today and they feel a lil lose without being all strapped up in tights! This is progress! I wish that I could see overall loss in my arms though. Like I feel when I take a pic of myself I have this lil head on this fat body cause my arms make me look huge! I look ok when I wear long sleeve shirts but I feel very uncomfortable in a long sleeve shirt. I feel that it is cause my arms are so much larger. I know they have gone down but has it gone down enough is the question? NO! is the answer...

So besides my fat arms, I am very happy with my gag results as of yet. I know that the challenge is only half over and I hope to double my results in the coming weeks.

Cake and cupcakes!

So recently I have talked about baking more than ever. Did I mention I love to cook, I think so. Did I mention I love to bake, I'm sure of it! Well I want to share with you all the pics of all the cupcake and cake from the birthday party.

This is Minnie! Ain't she a cuite! That was my daughter's Party B-day Cake

This is tray 1&2 of cupcakes, one was halloween decorations!

Tray 3&4 had to have some cool down time in the fridge cause the icing started to melt.

Tray 5, we had to start using the tin trays cause we had no where else to put them!

Tray 6, They look sooo good! I found that I had pink sugar and called my mom at 8pm to come over and bring more. I begged and begged, she was a big poopie head and said no... BUT, she almost said yes (and this again is why I don't talk to my father)

These are the last 3 cupcakes that got away! They were a thank you for my neighbor who helped me do all those damn cupcakes!

And this is my neighbor who was more than the best ever! And that is our lil trooper who was up till almost 10pm with us! The poor thing was way too tired! And yes my neighbor is a Yankee fan. I don't know why we let her in the house wearing that but we did! Hubby is a Red Sox fan and everyone else are Met fans....


Now that you got to see all the cupcakes and the cake, I want to say that I found baking classes at the local Michaels, I really want to sign up for the classes. I just hope that they are free! They say that they cost but you can't find a cost anywhere. I will be going this week to see what they have available!
I mean I pretty much know how to do alot, I used to work in a bakery but I really only worked with butercream. I also never made buttercream. Even though I'm in love with it. More than anything I need the right supplies! I need a pastry bag and I need the tools to decorate cakes. I can make layered cakes and its loads of fun but they always come out crappy cause I don't have the right stuff. I talked to one of my friends she gets her supplies from Michaels, she says they have ready made fondant and everything too! I never though the craft store would be the place to carry baking supplies but I guess it makes sense...

Even though I am on a diet I have been very good when baking to not go over board! I have one piece, or less than a serving once a day. Since my cal are low every day I have room. I try my hardest though to keep my sugar low. But I also know depriving my body of sweets leads to disaster. So I try to keep any dessert to a limited quantity.
So this has been my stick lately. I guess its part of my creativity that I have been hiding... That and sometimes I feel bored! I feel like I can be doing soooo much more with my time. I really want to do soo much, I feel sometimes that I can and sometimes that I'm completely incapacitated. I really want to get over that feeling. I know I should be able to do anything and everything. One day I will get there I just hope that it is soon!

back to the old grind

Well, Back to the old grind I have much to go over with everyone.

I have come to some new realizations. Thanks to GAG and Ms. Sheila! I am expanding myself over here. I know that most of my blog has not been about weight loss, but most of it has been. And I do mean MOST of it. I have set out to accomplish more with this challenge than just lose weight. And at that, my only "weight loss" posts will happen on Tuesday. (unless a post for GAG challenge). I am going to focus on many different things here. But I want this blog to be about me. Many times I talk about my daughter and what not, but I will not be going on about all that any more. This blog, after the challenge will be re-named to suit it better. But I have started 2 other blogs and I will be using them. My mommy blog and my organizational pages... Many days I post on here just what has to be done and other days my whole post revolves around my daughter. I am more than just them! I have more going on in my life than just them. I have soo much to say about my life that this won't cut it. I will start posting real blogs too not just ramble. I will post about topics that interest me, about things that bother me. What inspires me, and so on I think you get the idea. I am going to be doing more with my life, I feel that my daughter is older and I can let go a little bit. My life doesn't always have to depend on her. I can sit and read while she plays I can write while she plays. We can do different things together. And not all baby things. I feel that I can do a full 30min work out with her next to me. I am not sure how well it will work but I have a feeling that I can do it! I also have a feeling that I can write my first book with her around. I feel that I can accomplish more with her than I give myself credit!

Anyway, I will be keeping you all posted on my daily life and what not. I have many many things going on in my life, Please check out my other blogs too. so this way you know everything that I am up to.

I met my goal!

I am 144! That's what I was before this weekend and that's what I am now! I do have my period.. (phew)... but I dont feel too bloated... a word to anyone who is having problems with going#2... spinach dip cleaned out my system! WOW, did it ever. anyway I finished all the dip yesterday so there is no more left. I am proud to say that I crossed off 145 on my goals list! it was a big goal for me and being at 144 is really amazing! I have never been here and stayed here so lets make this a good step in the right direction (aka lets forget about the cupcake I had with my breakfast!) On the workout front, I am still sick and I just got my period.... not to mention that baby is sicky with allergies and can't breath and has a hard time sleeping. So working out was kind of hard. that and We were up till 945 doing laundry (yes the baby too, I know I'm a bad mommy)... but it had to get done! Tonight she will be going to bed on time! With a bath and her teeth brushed! I always forget to do that. Ok seriously, I think I need to start my own personal blog, and start up my mommy blog stuff again! I really want to do my website again, I have soo much to share!
Well this post is not supposed to be about me it is supposed to be about Breast Cancer! I want to let everyone know that this is something that touches home for me! I have seen many people live through this horrific tragedy. It is not an easy thing. It takes a lot of guts to over come such hardships. But I believe that with the dedication and support that everyone is giving Breast Cancer anyone and everyone can overcome it! Please take part in some action to show your support for Breast Cancer this month. Buy or wear something pink, do something for someone else. Make some sort of an effort! I will be buying a Pink candle and giving it to my boss' wife who is currently battling Breast Cancer and just got out of surgery on Friday. I will also be having a week of silence here on my blog, You will not be able to leave comments. Please come back on Wednesday of next week to check in on me! I hope to accomplish a lot by then. But until then I wish everyone a wonderful week.

weekend

So this weekend I want to say I did very well, in total I had 3 cupcakes on Saturday and 2 on Sunday. We still have about 3 dozen cupcakes left. and a quarter of the bday cake! I was great with cake Im estimating that each cupcake was 225 cal(on the high side) But I think I made more of an opps with the spinach dip! yummo! my friend makes it, its the most amazing thing in the world! soo fn good! my goal was less chips but more dip! Yesterday I would have to say I had 3 servings of chips and about 7 servings of dip. its cheese and artichokes and spinach, not crazy bad for you but cal do add up. I have no idea how much it would be and I don't want to know. all I know is friday I was 144, I have not weighed in since. If I had any idea I would say its back at 146. I will be working out tonight so I should be swollen tomorrow. I am still sick. and my point count from last week is all messed up, I will try to fix it and give a total later. I am happy to say that even though I am still sick, I was able to get everything done the party went well (thanks to amazing friends!) and we will be having a new addition to the family soon! (april 8th) Hubby's aunt, she is 34, my new bff! she is 4 months preggo. Im sooo mad she kept it from me, but not mad enough not to be SUPER BEYOND WORDS HAPPY! They kept the preggo from everyone! so im not soo upset, than again all she had to do was smile and I knew! oh its soo exciting I hope its a boy! I hope I hope I hope! Anyway I can tell you right now most of my wed/fri will be taken up by taking care of the new momma! uh I cant even tell you how happy I am! I am going over there on Friday to help her out cause she has 2 kids and is super sick, poor thing. Anyway, I am still sick myself, better but if not better by wed I am going to the doc! (two fold a scale that is very accurate!) Oh and I got back the food stamps stuff, I sent in all the documents that they needed! I am soo proud of myself! I am really hoping that this goes through. I know that its not something to be proud about but its something that will save me and hubby's butt every month!

And I have a new modivating factor to keep my desk at home organized every day... my daughter can reach and pull everything down! AHHH, its hell, so every day for the past week I have been keeping it all nice and clean and everything put away... also, despite my constant complaints of not having everything always in its place, found all the paperwork for the food stamps in like 5 min and was able to do it all in like 20! I have to say that I am very organized even though I complain I'm not as organized as I want to be.

I am going to be working out tonight without fail! and I am going to be walking tomorrow. I dont know if 2 workouts tomorrow is a good idea cause I am still sick. I will see when the time comes. Ok well lata everyone, I got to go check on the rest of my team and I have to change my background for the week of silence that is rapidly approaching!

week 6 challenge :Totals

Water: 15 points for every 8oz
Tuesday [120] 8 Glasses
Wednesday [150] 10 Glasses
Thursday [] 3
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Supliments (Vitamins and minerals): 10 points a day
Tuesday [X]
Wednesday [X]
Thursday [X] I almost forgot but I did get them!
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Food: 25 Points for every day you stick to plan
Tuesday[X]
Wednesday[]
Thursday[]
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Exercise: 25 Points for every 30 minutes
Tuesday []
Wednesday []
Thursday []
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Sleep: 10 points for 6 hours sleep, 15 points for 7 hours sleep, 20 points for 8+ hours sleep (per day) (this may be impossible but we shall see!
Tuesday [10pm - 2:30]
Wednesday [8pm-2am]I forced myself to sleep. I had to pee at 2, but otherwise it would have been 7 hours!
Thursday []
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Blogging: 25 points per day
Tuesday [X]
Wednesday [X]
Thursday [X]
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Team Support: 50 points (per entire challenge)
Tuesday [X]
Wednesday [X]
Thursday [X]
Friday[]
Saturday[]
Sunday[]
Monday[]

Holiday Prep: 50 points (per entire challenge)
I decorated for Halloween! I know that doesn't count, this week it will not happen with the party and all. I do have alot of planning left for the party. I will place it here and let you decide if it counts:

To do:
(Wednesday)
Clean florida room (daddy has baby)
Clean living room (with baby) [X]
put down play matt!!!!! [X]
Clean laundry room (with baby)[X]
finish putting away baby's laundry (with baby) [X]

(thursday)- food shopping (with baby)
Barnes and nobel( steffies present)
bath and body work (michelle's present)
Tomato sauce
Chop meat
Chunk meat
Veggies (carrots,celery, cherry tomatos, can of olives)
Ranch dip for veggies (we have! wahoo)
Onions
soda/juice
Mop floors(daddy has baby)
Caity coming over to help with cupcakes(bringing extra trays)

(Friday)
make sauce for ziti
soda
Bread chicken cutlet
make cake and cupcakes (caity coming over)
Clean kitchen(with baby)


(Saturday)
decorate (steff coming to help at 11)
make chicken cutlet
Put together baked ziti
Balloons at 12/Ice
2pm stick fries in oven



Do something for you : 50 points (per entire challenge)

I did something for myself the other day. I bought a waxing kit. I plan on using it this weekend. I will update you if i do, I will also be doing my nails!

Thank you

Thanks ladies for caring about me. I just want to make this quick. I am still sick and still chuggn along I stayed home from work today and got 2 more hours of sleep. bugga is sleeping now... I just finished washing the kitchen from top to bottom litterally... Anyway I got much more to do. since I dont have the time to chit chat I just wanted to let you all know that I am down to 144, it might be right it might not, but I finally went #2 which means I feel 10lbs lighter... the only other thing is I have had sooo little fluids today :( that I know im low on water weight.. I am going to go hydrate myself now... Take to you all on sunday I will post pics of the party! everyone take care and have a wonderful weekend!

This momma is officially sick!

uh, yes you heard it first, im sick! I think I have the flu! We have her first bday party and I'm sick. But me and hubby thinks we know where it came from. my MIL and FIL both got the flu shots, than omar got what we think was a minor flu also, now me and my BIL are both sick.. I also think that the reason my daughter was the way she was for the past few days with fevers and what not was from the flu... poor thing. I mean 2 teeth did come in but to have constant on/off fevers for 4 days, it was the flu... I'm living through this thing cause im on motrin... its helping but I still feel it. No wonder I have felt like such shit these past few days! ok anyway.. I have alot to do today its going to be a busy day. I also really want to get some work done at work today... So I will keep this short

I am 147 today. Now normally I would say fine, but this being sick would explain the needing to pee every 5 min, and I have been drinking way lots more water than I usually do. that and im prob holding a lot of water too. I also can't seem to go #2 on a regular basis. I dont get it I feel like I'm caring 5lbs just in my bowels! So anyway I'm a lil up but not really concerned about it. Im sick at the moment. my main concern is to stay super hydrated and just get better. I don't have time to rest so I just have to take it easy!

I don't want to be at work today but we need the money and I have to go to the bank on my way home. Hubby got his FIRST PAYCHECK. I am sooo proud of him! he is super excited too! (he just won't say it)...

I do have to say though that I still feel that if I'm bloated my pants won't fit.. even though they still do! Its an odd concept. I guess that I have not been able to fit into my cloths for so long I feel that I am still what I once was. I also have a poor image of myself currently because of what I used to look like. I have lost the weight I am less than I was prepreg. and yet I feel overwhelmed with what I used to be and not what I am. I mean wearing my pants they fit better than they did before I was preggo. They really do, I have lost alot in my lower half which at one time I though would have been impossible. I always had a large butty! I was always proud of it. and its leaving me, upset no, concerned, a little. I have always loved my large lower half. It was always good to me. hehe, ok seriously though, its just odd to be losing my bottom half. I really want to lose my tummy more than anything. I know sit ups are in order and I was doing them for a while. Not recently with the way I have been feeling. Although I do have to say I have been walking more than I ever have since HS. Wow I was crazy back then, I used to walk miles on end all over the place! The place I do want to lose weight is on the inside of my thighs... and my arms. They have gone down drastically but not enough to what I want. I feel like I got super fat arms and the inside of my legs need to lose a lil of the jiggle! I know though that none of it will go away unless I start working out. my next 10lbs have to be lost through working out. I know its a procrastinating way of putting it but starting Monday I will start working out. This weekend will be hell. I am going to try to do something for sun, but most likely I will need to rest.. Ok thats my plan! than I have 1 week of no weigh in or blogging so I can so focus on my cal and my exercise instead! But before all that I have to soooo get better... later people!

ps this is crazy it took me 5 hours to type this post in between all the work I had today..
pps I hate some of our customers, they think cause they are rich that they are the end all be all...

The week ahead

So it seems that we are having a week of silence for BC. I am so in, I will not be blogging and my site will also be pink! I am just letting you all know ahead of time. I think it will give me a much needed break too. I have a lot of people I know that have/had BC and I feel that they would appreciate a dedication to what they have gone through.

on the front of weight loss I have a maintain again I am 145.5, I still feel bloated but I think its cause I soo have to work out. I need to move around and be active. I really need too I think everything in my life is suffering because I have not worked out recently. I have the drive to do more but by the end of the day its gone. Its so hard to keep up. I know alot of it is cause I don't get enough sleep but there is no way around that at this point. I have to keep going! I have to be persistant with my workouts. you would think with they way that I talk to myself I should work out every day.. and yet I don't. my daughter kept on handing me the EA active game... I really want to but i havn't yet... ttg... got to make dindin...

Tue, Oct 06 2009
Grade Grams Cals

Breakfast

Raisin Cinnamon Swirl Bread
B 100 80
Immune Defense
A 9 24
100% Natural Green Tea
3 0
Lowfat Plain
A 114 61
Sugars, Granulated
D+ 17 66

Lunch

pbj
400

Dinner

Breaded Chicken Cutlet Raised Without Antibiotics
C 369 358
Potatoes, Mashed, Home-prepared, Whole Milk And Margarine Added
B 210 237

Total Calories Consumed
1,226

I logged my cal for today, in a really long time. I felt completly fine. a lil part of me wanted to binge but I didn't I had a lil piece of steak that I made for my lunch tomorrow so I am going to guess that puts me at 1300 cal for the day! I am very proud of myself. I did great today! I also had a lot more water today. I also switched my tea from green tea to bay leave tea. I am going to do the same thing in the morning. My stomach has been bothering me lately and bay leave tea always makes me feel better. I am still continuing with the 4 tsp of sugar in the mornings and on the weekends since I dont have my yogurt (even though I should), I only have 3 tsp of sugar. I am proud that I was able to not binge on anything. Hubby has a huge cup of hot coco that I would love right about now, but I said no had a glass of water and left. it would have been 300 cal! I really didnt want to go over, I have done soo well today...

And today was a big day! Me and the munchkin got everything on our list done! I am so proud of us! She was cranky and not havn much, but when we got out she was a good lil girl, except for tryn to run away from me in CVS, she thinks now that she is 1 she is all big and independent(haha)... well here is her bday cake! :

There she is in all her cake and glory... she got so upset when she saw the cake and couldn't eat it! she had to have it... crazy! anyway messalot is all there... I was completly grossed out by the mess she made but had to clean it up anyway... ok its off to bed for this momma!