Monday, January 03, 2011

Feelin great

So new years eve and today I went to the gym! It feels great to be back there all the time. It really helps center me and relax me.. also to help get rid of my extra energy so that I can sleep better too... same for my daughter... she wasn't too bad leaving today. Which helped.

I have been enjoying the gym! I really have! I have so much on my plate its almost the last thing I Want to add but it makes me feel good about myself. Now I just need to start seeing results! I have been lookin at pics of myself lately and I feel I look horrible! And if people were to hear me say that they would get very upset at me. But I am just very unhappy with the way my body is right now. It is no one else's choice to make for me. I need to be and feel a certain way to enjoy the way I look.

Just while doing yoga today with the mirror I was embraced about my appearance... its such a bad feeling. I have no idea why its so hard but it just is. I need to shead all this excess and quickly. Just to feel comfortable in my cloths and in my skin. To be able to feel sexy again... I want to also start eating much less I know that working out allows me more ability to control my eating but I feel I am still eating in excess of what I need... its disturbing too. I feel sometimes I can't control it! I have no idea what comes over me. I know I love my food but honestly... there is no reason I should be eating the amout of food that I do.

I have been taking diligence to make sure that I take my green tea pills and my fizzy tabs and tryn to just eat a lil bit less every day... some days are better than others. I have to start cal counting again. It's just hard with my mom cooking instead of me. She also makes my tea every morning with way too much honey. It kills my cal count!!! She is also expecting me yo be a human garbage disposal.... Oy!

I will be doing whatever I can to cut down and reduce cal! I know i am getting there. It is slow but I am making great progreas for myself. I am proud and determined to continue with the gym. It's tremendous help! Wed I will be doing a lot of eclipse!

Ok I am off to bed right now I am Sooo damn tired!


  1. honey=60 cal. per tablespoon. ack.
    a tablespoon of sugar is only 45 calories.
    moms...she is probably trying to nurture you through food. Good job on getting back to the gym.
    It does make you feel better and it is truly for you....good job.

  2. yea all my mom wants to do is feed me! hehe. Thanks Christine! Lov ya!

  3. I just came across your blog and I'm your newest follower :) Good luck on your weight loss goals!



Measurments- sept 1, 2009

L arm: 12.5
R arm: 12.5
L thigh: 26
R thigh: 25.5
L calf: 15
R calf: 14.5
Bust: 34.5
Waist: 37
Thighs: 40.5