Thursday, May 27, 2010

Taking a break

Hello everyone I will be taking a break from blogger and weight loss for a lil bit and just trying to do it on my own.. I have so many other priorities that are taking up my time, when I have time I will be back but focusing on what is really important is getting me to the next level in my business come hell or high water! I am so close and know that with more dedication I can go above and beyond any expectations. I hope to be back here soon enough till than I wish you all good luck!


Saturday, May 22, 2010


crapped out and dying from my wisdom teeth.. I will return when I rise from my death.. :(

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

What is important to you in your life?

I am asking everyone far and wide! What do you want out of your life? How do you plan on getting there? What makes you tick? What are you passionate about?

These are very hard questions to ask but I would love to get to know you all much better so I ask, What is important to you? What do you value and where will that take you?

I will do a full post about your answers and my own tomorrow.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Time to move upward and onward!

I am officially over working for someone else!!!! I can no longer subject myself to this!!!! NO WAY!  My goals are pushed to ASAP!!!!

ok anyway enough about work, I have to say that despite the fact that I am 146 still, its that damn plateau! I feel great! I feel smaller today, I dont know I just dont feel so bloated which is why I weighed myself... Although last night I ate a few things that cost me! I was doing so good the rest of the day, BUT I do have to say that I need to be drinking more water. That is the key at this point... The water that I am drinking isn't enough. Not even close!!!! I need to triple the amount of water that I am consuming! doing this should help get rid of some wanting to over indulge! I have most control over what I am eating currently, although yesterday I should have worked out and I didn't... got a lil depressed at the end of last night... I have a problem with things when they don't go my way.... :( anyway...

I will be working on control and a work out tonight.. and I am currently drinking a bottle of water, which I hope helps! but I will leave you for now I have work to do for someone else's business... which I am not happy about... but I will live for now... till I don't have to deal than I will strive!

Monday, May 17, 2010

I feel amazing!!!

I really do! I am back on my pills, so I feel like a normal person. I have just the right amount of energy I can focus and stay concentrated, I can push myself to do things that need to be done, that normally I would so not have ever gotten to doing. I am enjoying the feeling of not always being starving!!! Most of all I am enjoying feeling like myself again!

I also think hubby is super happy because I feel better and he doesn't have to hear me complain that I am tired. He doesn't have to hear me say how this or that sux and I am more willing to go out and do things, which he always complains that I am just too tired for anything..

So overall this weekend went great, we so sucked at Atlantic City which I don't even care about cause we had loads of fun! I loved every second of it! I had the company of great friends, I didn't do too bad on food I worked out ;) I stayed on track to do soo much! I get to enjoy myself again this week! I have to work this weekend which means I will be really having fun!!!!

Like I said the other day no weight in cause of my period till Wednesday but I feel like I am not bloated or huge right now so that is a lil bit more positive! Taking each day one at a time and striving for tomorrow to be better than today!

Hope you all had a fantastic weekend!

Sunday, May 16, 2010


We went to Ac and lost!!! but we were good enough to realize that it was just a horrible night and we left with some of our own money as for how I am doing... well its 6am and I am awake! not too tired and just about to go get my workout on!!!!

Oh yeah!!!!!!!

Ok, just wanted to give a quick Sunday update... I have not checked my weight super bloated because of TOM, so I am going to wait till Wed for any further weigh ins...

xoxo to all!!!

Friday, May 14, 2010


First off thanks to the wonderful power of tracking a package from UPS I know that my green tea pills will be waiting for me when I get home! Thats first, second we are actually doing this whole Atlantic City thing. I am so excited to go out! We came to the conclusion that we will be going with another couple that is on our same wave length. So I have a feeling that we will have loads of fun!!!! It wont be just me and hubby but hey we will still have a great night. Than lets see business wise I am so excited for my next step! I have been working hard and have a feeling that we will BLOW THIS MONTH AWAY!!!!

I can't even put into words how excited I am about my on top of the world feeling! My month is going GREAT! I might not have any volume to actually accumulate yet but let me tell you by the end of next weekend I am going to be all pooped and over worked and my month end will look AMAZING! Most importantly what I will look like myself!

I have a goal to work out every day I do not work, Since I only work Wednesday, and the weekend next week, I have the Wii all hooked up and ready to go! After my pity party txt msg to my hubby about not having a hooked up Wii :) Im amazing! haha,  I will not be working out tonight but... I will be walking all night so I guess that will count for something. I will workout this weekend! And Sunday I will go for a walk too! My goals for min from here to the end of the month are.... 450 min! I will keep you posted on how I do!

Compared to everyone else in the challenge I feel like such a slacker when it comes to min of workouts... but alas that is sometimes out of my control when it comes to my body... YET... I will be regaining my control today and turning over a new leaf with energy to keep moving forward ( "Meet the Robinson's ")

Also I will be doing a few more editorial type posts on here as soon as I get a chance.... I love to write and want to continue to do so. I am also going to be refocusing on my book. I am happy to say that I have not forgotten about it but I have been busy building a business. I am starting to get my sched and planning down a little bit more so I will be staying more on top of compartmentalizing reading/writing/working/being...

I have been doing a great job and just letting things go and enjoying where I am when I am there... A stress free approach to life. As hard of a concept to grasp as it is, I am finding the time to just kick back and say it can wait. Well, I have also fussed and stressed and overdone everything at certain times to than enjoy what I am doing at other times of my day.

I guess that at almost 24 I can say that my life is finally starting to fall into place??? I would say that in an over all picture things are starting to take shape to where I see them going and what I want out of life. Am I even close to the end, well of course not... I have a long life ahead of me but I feel that I have finally started my life journey. I have complied my goals and aspirations. I know where I am heading and how I am getting there. Does that mean I have a 5 year plan (like my father always said I should... ) no, I have no 5 year plan, nor do I want one. But I know within the next 5 years I would have accomplished some great things in my life. I do have a list of everything I want to do and need to do and goals to accomplish. Well I have a good feeling about that list to be accomplished within those 5 years. Some are huge and will only be started within the next 5 years, some are so minor I could do them tomorrow but might not reach finally till 4 years from now but I know that with growth comes progress.

well I guess in conclusion life is good. maybe I dont have everything I want here and now but I know where I will be looks bright and promising!!!!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Week One Weigh In!!

No good news to report: 146.0 which I am not surprised about... I have been so busy and everything is all over the place.... But I am trying my hardest to stay focused as often as possible. I should be getting my green tea pills by Monday so I will finally start to feel like myself again! I plan on having energy again! from that I can focus on getting active... It is very hard to be active when you are constantly falling asleep!

I have work tonight and I have so many other things to do also.. me and hubby are planing to go to Atlantic city this Friday just for the night and to drive back in the early am... I am very excited about going but I want it to be just us! No one else...we never get alone time, we never get to be just us... if we dont have the baby we have either his brother or some other family member or we are home and doing nothing... Hubby wants his father to come... I don't want him to come I want to enjoy my hubby all to myself... and hubby wants to leave as soon as we hit or make some money and if we take his father he will not let us leave let alone let us make money! he will make 5000 and leave with -2000! he does it all the time... last time we went with him we were up 2000... we lost all of it cause of him... and if hubby wants to leave his father will not let us.... its not that I dont love my father in law I do... but I want some alone time with hubby just to be us... not worry about someone else being there and not have to accommodate someone else's wishes.. anyway.. I have work tonight and tomorrow and if all goes well I will be district come next weekend!!!!!

ok that's enough for right now... I am overwhelmed so far! I have been looking for something new to cook for hubby and let me tell you... I cant find jack shit!!!! nothing else that he would eat! Nada zero zilch! he is sooo damn picky and I dont know what else to do... he eats meat and potatoes and occasionally will have broccoli... and pasta... no rice no other veggies no mushrooms, half the meat recipes call for mustard so he wont eat those... and Im worried about cooking tonight when I have to get ready to go out tonight!!! uhhh!!!!

yea I dont know why but I am very pmsie lately... its quite bad!!!! no its really bad cause the way I feel and am acting is pissing me off more I dont like being like this at all. it bothers me way more than anything else in the world.. I am also beyond tired at this point....

ok well I have to figure something out to fix my problem I know its cause of my cfs that I am so tired and that's why I am eagerly awaiting my green tea pills... they are supposed to help suppress your appetite and help you lose weight but the best thing they do for me is simply give me the energy that a normal person has! And the impatience for my pills are killing me!!!!

I am going to go... talk to everyone later... sorry about the downer today..

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


Hey peeps!
Sorry everyone has been complaining about my layout... I have no idea how to change it... I will see what I can do tho, just be patient... thanks!

Yesterday I did great till brownies walked into my house... and it was late at night... and they were oh so yummy... and it messed up my almost perfect day! I had like a dozen french fries that I shouldn't of had, but besides that my day would have been perfect EXCEPT my mom just had to bring brownies over...

oh well, good intentions... she means well. She also doesn't know I'm on a diet... anyway...

It was a long night and I am way tired this morning.. so I am going to go and slowly get work done today..

Monday, May 10, 2010

What a weekend

First off I have to get this neg out: I almost decked a bitch out this weekend. f'n rude inconsiderate mouse looking slut of a bitch. she is two faced and feels that my hubby is her right.. well guess what bitch your lucky you didn't say anything on Saturday night! if you did you would have wound up in the hospital! And since your rude and stupid you also lost your friendship with my hubby cause he dont want to be friends with you cause I'm more important to him and if you cant be considerate of me than he ain't got no place for your broke bitch ass! Scared mother fucking piece of shit!

Sorry about that people, it just had to be said... moving on.. This weekend as you can see what quite eventful. Saturday was a bad bad day... Lets put it this way I shouldn't have worn my bracelet at all! But besides the bitch everything went wonderful! And despite the pompous bitch me and hubby had a long talk, and he realized that even tho she says they are only friends and he has no intentions of ever cheating on me ( and I trust him wholeheartedly) he will not continue to be friends with her. He sees what I see now that that bitch has an agenda and he wants no part of it. He understands where I am coming from and never wants to put himself in any sort of situation that would ultimately lead to hurting me. But what I find funny is I met the other girls he works with, and I love every single on of them except for the home wrecking hoe... I do have to say though, one girl there Roxanne, I love her to death! and the funny thing Hubby said when they first met a work she was all over him (well duh he is hot), but once she found out that he was engaged she backed off. (like any sensible person would do), And to boot she was the sweetest thing ever! I can see her as my new bff! We clicked right away, and hubby even called it he was like I knew you two would hit it off. She is Persian and very into her culture!

Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed my Saturday night. I even got all dressed up on purpose to scare the damn bitch, All black outfit with my rockandroll top, black nails and toes, pyramids and all! She didn't know where to stick her head when she saw me!!!! Funny thing was if you check my facebook, I don't dress goth/punk no more, so when she saw me she was quite intimidated! I love myself!!!!

than lets see Sunday... MOMMY'S day! Oh I had a wonderful day. Very simple and laid back... I was able to take a 3 hour nap with the baby and we just had an overall good day. I went off on my brother-in-law a few times, just for kicks and it made my day perfect!

Eating wise... well that's another story! I am at 147, which is bad but I didn't do diddly squat this weekend. So it shows. I am starting a full weight loss regiment this week! No more slacking and no more pushing anything off... complete discipline! Me disciplined ha! but yes I will be! I know it will not be easy but I am more than determined to meet my goals! I will continue to strive for better also!

Now for the best part of my weekend, what I got for Mommy's day: I got the sexiest pair of red heals EVER!!!! I love them to death! Too bad I dont have an occasion every day to wear them but you know I will make excuses to wear them! Hubby picked them out and he loves them! It kind of hurts with my pinkie toe but I sooooooooooooo dont care! Now if I just lose a lil bit more weight I have a sexy pair of white jeans that would look HOT with these shoes!!!!!

As for business, I have no RV yet but I already know that I made district! I have 3 prospects interested and 2 parties!!!! if I make my goals for this month next month is going to be such a piece of cake! I am enjoying myself while I work and that's what is most important isn't it? I also pushed up my goals for September, to get my white Mercedes by then! Its really not that hard! and I know that I can sooo do this!

Friday, May 07, 2010

Real Quick

Friday is a bad day for me to post cause I am busy at work so I just want to say real quick,

Sorry to everyone for not being able to check out their blogs and respond I will this weekend. I want to see what everyone is up to!

Also I had Chinese food last night (bad mommy! ) but it was just way toooooo gooooodddd!! anyway... I did not weigh myself this morning for that reason... Hubby will be moving the Wii for me to use as soon as we upgrade to the new black one...

What else... I got a raise at work! very happy about that! a few other things but I so have to run

lov ya all!!!!

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Well than....

I had planned a wonderful post. But I was reading a blog that was so sad.. and I feel so much for other people's emotions so I am kind of bummed right now..

But I still have good news I am still at 145.5 after having a wonderful day even though I ended it with Ice Cream! (just a single scoop), and I put in a 50 min walk! I am beyond proud of my resolve to work hard and push myself for more. the 50 min did NOT include running after my daughter at the library/walking around toys r us(which you all know is like way big!) and than walking another 15 min to and from car... so in all I feel that 50 min (timed) is a great accomplishment ON TOP of everything else I did yesterday!

I do have to say, I changed my bracelet a few times yesterday, not many but I realized something. I have been working hard at controlling or eliminating any negative thinking for more than quite some time now. So for me to do this challenge is more like a test than the performance. I have always been positive and my resolve to stay positive will increase in leaps and bounds! I just feel for others and reading a blog that is so sad to see others going through things that are not controlled by our own actions but by the actions of others hurts me...

Than again I feel for others more than anyone will ever know, (shhh... don't tell anyone). I am always the tough girl with the hard armadillo shell and usually my armor shell is in place and always works but to know fear/joy/love/hate, and to know that I fear the things that others might have to go through or that I anticipate and fear my own failure makes me lose my shell. Fear is a nasty, nasty "thing". It takes a life of its own inside of you! Even a fear for good things happening.. Well you know what I refuse fear! I refuse to compare and contrast for what could be to what is! I reject the feeling of being lost. I need to be strong and realize that fear is a figment of my imagination!  Fear of getting hurt while I work out is not going to stop me, fear of not making it to the top can not hinder me. Fear to know that someone somewhere is hurting. That that fear could hurt me too will not stop my life in its tracks!

I have been listening to a lot of motivational trainings for Arbonne. But most do not talk about the fear that is a result of others around you. And quite frankly as much as I love the people I know and feel for them I need to separate myself from other people's emotions to be internally happy. Which is what I truly want. As much as I have always been happy and enthusiastic about life there are certain times like these that when others suffer I suffer and I fear along with that suffering.... But my life has no room for suffering and fear I need to take control of who/what/and where I am with myself and stand up straight and just be me, happy and continue to know that there are worse things in this world than fear...(well ok no there isn't fear is as bad as it gets and its completely fake) Fear is only what you make of it and the amount of time and though that you give it.

So I am no longer giving fear the time of day. I am rejecting fear. I am not going to try I am going to do. I am going to be free of fear and from now on that word will no longer be in my vocabulary!

PS: there is only one other word that I have eliminated from my vocabulary: hate, I used it only once today in my post as an example I never use it in my everyday vocabulary because it is a very ugly word to be associated with. so adding to my ex vocabulary of words will be fear. There is no room in my world for those two words. And I think everyone should take a good hard look at the things we say every day to change how we feel everyday!

To a better life free of those two ugly words!!!!!!! Have a wonderful day everyone!!!!

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

LHA Challenge.... GO!

So There you have it ladies, (the date and time is wrong but who cares!) This morning I was at 145.5! Yes I am happy to be at this point! starting my weight loss challenge with exactly 20lbs to lose!!!!! Can we do it? Yes we can!!!!!

Today is an exciting day, especially after last night! I am in such a phenomenal mood!

I can't even explain how pumped I am for this challenge and the challenge I have ahead of me to make my goals come true for this month! 

Along with LHA I will be doing another personal challenge. I am going to eliminate negative comments and neg thoughts from my life! I think everyone knows how often I say "uh" and how I am been on a mission to use that word less well, I was listening to a training call the other day and a Pasteur had come up with an idea of forming good positive thinking and eliminating the negative thoughts!  Essentially the idea is simple. This is a 3 week challenge to not say one negative thing! This can take up to several months to accomplish though. So wearing a bracelet that will stand as a reminder that you are not going to say anything negative. If something negative is said (or though, because a though constitutes a negative action), you are to switch the bracelet to the other wrist. Keeping the bracelet on one wrist for three weeks (21 days forms a new habit), will mean that you have accomplished the challenge!!!! Now I am starting today and I know usually I am a positive person but I want my whole world around me to stink of positive notions and attitudes!!! 

So I am starting a-new! I am in such a great mood today and nothing can get me down! LETS GO LHA!!!!

I also want to say thank you to Christine and her sister for doing LHA.

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

Night before

So, am I focused on weightloss! yes! I can't get it out of my head! but I have a major goal and task ahead of me... Make DM (arbonne next level up) by end of the month... which means...... I want to lose weight for my recognition!!!! I want to be all sexy and skinny! haha! anyway.... I am uber excited about my night and about tomorrow!

I am finally doing everything I want I am losing weigh for myself and my results will be beneficial for CF. And I am working and achieving all of my goals when it comes to my business! I am becoming a sucess in my own way. I am working towards goals and achieving them I am enjoying everything that I do and I am having everything work out!

Right now I have a few goals to accomplish in this challenge and in the month of May. May I want to lose a total of 8lbs. I know my goal is high but my determination to make it work. I want to be at 140 and I want that number to stick.. I will stay focused and know that working out and cutting cal will get me far in my goal! I have been doing good so far but find myself snacking and over indulging because of my daughter's eating habits.

I must separate my daughter's eating from my own. This will really determine my success!  I am focused and will remain so, and I refuse to plateau at 144!!!!!

Ok I am going to sleep so I can get up early and work out in the morning. Also tomorrow will be another walk...

So far I have friday 45 min and a half hour at the mall
saturday 5/1 half hour with my mom (slow but still a half hour)

Till tomorrow!!!!

Saturday, May 01, 2010


I love this time of year! today should be 90!!! with not too much humidity makes today just the most perfect day ever! Yesterday I went for a nice long walk! Me and baby thoroughly enjoyed ourselves on our walk yesterday! we walked around the neighborhood for 45 min! Than another half hour walking around the mall at night...

I started a log on my blackberry for how long I am walking... I am hoping it will help me track the amount of min that I walk (as long as I keep up with it). Than I will do another log for how many min a night I do a workout with my EA Active. I want to accumulate a couple hundred min a month... I want to have 1000 min of workouts every month! I figure that is 5 days a week of 45 min or more walking.. and another 100 min of workouts!

well actually to push myself I should do 1500 a month! That would make it a reachable goal but also one that requires some effort..

Ok i have a child sitting on my lap right now... trying to draw and I can no longer type.. so my goal will be 1500 min of working out and walking for May! that and 1200 cal days! Lets go get em!


Measurments- sept 1, 2009

L arm: 12.5
R arm: 12.5
L thigh: 26
R thigh: 25.5
L calf: 15
R calf: 14.5
Bust: 34.5
Waist: 37
Thighs: 40.5