The past does not forget the future will not remember

I will probably be using that title alot...

Anyway, facebook is yet again amazing...amazingly annoying! I have been blogging since I was in high school I have no problem writing out and sharing my feelings over the internet. I have been apart of Xanga since 2002! 8 years later I have not changed and will not change. Actually I didn't blog from 05-09, which means for those 4 years it was quite rough. Anyway, why blog and not get pissed but facebook ticks me off... cause people can look you up on facebook! That's why! With blogging you find your niche with friends and you stay there, you can expand or not and if you don't post a pic no one really knows who you are. Its very much a ghost writer, and if you ask when I publish my books I will have an alias! I will not,never,ever put my name on there....

Also I find on blogs, people base their opinions and options about what you have to say, who you are inside and to me that makes a difference. I enjoy speaking to people on topics that I have written or they have written because quite frankly you are having a meaningful conversation about a topic that has clout or is something that wants to be discussed. Not some random fn' comments on facebook, or some random fn people talk'n to you about god knows what. Worst of all people tryn' to get in touch with you that you want nothing to do with. Give me a blog any F'n day, I will pour my heart out and let the world see it. But FOR GOD'S SAKE GO AWAY!

No, not you, not anyone on my blog I love you all and I love you dearly. I am talking to my ex that I broke up with 6 years ago, he found me on facebook, he msgs me to say hi and wants to know how I'm doing, Really you wanna know how I'm doini, pissed is how I'm doin. GO AWAY, I got you out of my life for a reason. I don't want you in my life and I never want you back in my life. As it is this kid has gotten people against me enough that they want me dead. Seriously, I have to avoid people and places cause of this kid. I had to look like a coward once when me and hubby were dating so that he wouldn't wind up getting hurt. I would have faced the guy head on, but I didn't want anything to happen to hubby. Its one thing for me but now that I also have a daughter I have to watch out for my family! And this bitch wants to say hi! Go fuck yourself!

Anyway.... At least one guy that wants me dead is locked up down south so I don't have to worry much about him... But one lives all of 10 min from where I am. He goes to the same mall, shops in the same stores, lives 1 town over. I have to go to a further away super market cause thats his "stomping grounds"...

and this kid wants to say HI!

now, now that I got that rant out of my system, why do I say the past does not forget, the future will not remember... Well... First off it is my quote. Actually I stole it from a music video, but that's another story.

I believe in strongly living in the present, I would say the future (but that would constitute worry), I have done the whole living in the past and your right. the past never forgets. I have said that line to myself many times growing up that I would never forget but you know what. I can forget I can give up what happened in the past and move from the here and now to what the next 10 min will bring me! I am done with my shady past. I love my life and have nothing against anyone who lives back there but I just can't.

I looked through my ex's pics, guess what he has several pics that I had taken with my camera! he has a pic of me and him! WHY??? I really don't know why. I don't know at all. And I wouldn't talk to him for the same reason I broke up with him. You would think people would better themselves you would think that a 25 year old would stop doing what he did back in high school. I am very mistaken about that. Oh well. My life is my happiness, and I am happy with my life! I have grown and I have matured and I have moved on. Am I still the same damn bitch hell yes I am. But don't f'n bother me in a life you are no longer a part of! So what I broke his little heart, I told him I wouldn't be with someone who did drugs... he didn't care enough too f'n bad. my opinion still hasn't changed... and hubby knows this... that the same thing would happen to him if he did drugs!

So for the fact that I have said many times on this blog I don't change well its true my morals and my way of life is the same! I do what I do and that is it. You want to do what you do stay the fuck out my life!

I don't remember you. You are not part of my life and lets keep it that way!